Passing on the torch....

I've been extrmely quiet, hoping that things would be easier to blog about once time has passed a bit.  They aren't, but in all hoensty this one particular thing never will.  A few weeks ago, we (big boss man, collegue and I) got back the comments about the paper we submitted.  The one where I am coresponding author. Accept with minor revisions.  I did the revisions sent them in, and word came down today that it is accepted!  But, this is the most bittersweet paper acceptance ever.  Big Boss Man passed away almost three weeks ago to the day.  I lost a mentor, a friend and probably one of the most influential men in my life.  If I learn one/tenth of what that man had forgotten, I would consider myself brilliant.  He had such a love for science, and just wanted to figure things out. I deal with grief by pretending it's not there, or cracking inappropriate jokes about it.  But today, seeing that paper with his name on as middle author and me as corresponding- well it was almost like closure, or passing on the torch.  Mr. Dr. Zeek told me that it never stops hurting, it just stops hurting so much. Right now, though, I'll just keep thinking that the old man would have been proud.